How to Be a Great Mom

2007-04-23T08:44:00.001-07:00

How to Be a Great Mom
The 9 surprising traits you need for your baby
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By Julie Tilsner
Sense of humor

The only way to deal with the huge life change a baby wreaks on your household is to be able to laugh about it. Yes, it's serious business. But who says you can't find hilarity in the fact that you're interested in the size and shape of your baby's poop, and that you refer to your husband as Daddy? Even better: You don't just have to laugh at yourself. It's pretty funny when Daddy forgets to put a towel over his shoulder before he burps the baby, and spitup befouls his shirt. Also, don't forget the leaky breasts, the leaky diapers, the leaky noses… Have fun!

Creativity
Like a Boy Scout, a new mom is (ideally) always prepared. Unfortunately, new moms are running on fewer brain cells and less sleep than your average Boy Scout, so we can be forgiven for being a little disorganized sometimes. Regardless, you have to be ready for the steady stream of surprises your baby will present, like the sudden bout of vomiting just as you strap him into the car seat. Or the random three-hour morning nap that would be great any other day, except that you have somewhere to be in an hour. Or when he hurls his last pacifier out the car window as you sit in traffic. You know you've earned your mom patch when you concoct a solution to these situations. (Hint: Always have a backup paci and baby wipes in the glove compartment, and if you have to shift your baby into his car seat when he's sleeping, set it right next to his crib before the switch to keep the movement to a minimum.) They don't call necessity the mother of invention for nothing.

Type B personality
You were going to be one kind of parent when you were pregnant: perfect and in control. Let those notions go. Babies have their own ideas on how to spend their days, and you can't be too controlling, or no one will be happy. Try to go with the flow as much as you can. While you're both getting to know each other in the first months, take advice from the Beatles and let it be: Your baby's natural rhythms will emerge, and you can build a workable schedule from the patterns you've observed. If she has her morning nap at 9 a.m., don't sign up for Mommy & Me at 10. Meet your mom friends at a caf้ and let her sleep in her stroller. "Help the baby adapt to the family routine, but be willing to compromise," says Dr. Greene. "Balance will happen if you're trying or not. And how much fun you have in the meantime depends on your willingness to roll with it."

Julie Tilsner is a mom of two and the author of Mommy Yoga: The 50 Stretches of Motherhood.

Happier Restaurant Trips.

2007-04-23T08:38:00.001-07:00

Happier Restaurant Trips "Reality Check"
columnist Denene Millner's 5 tips for eating out with the kids
By Denene Millner

You're finally ready to load up the baby and go out for a nice meal prepared by someone else. But while you're happy to be out, your fellow diners may not be all that excited about a tot fussing or whining through his dinner. Five ways to make going out to eat a pleasure for everyone in the restaurant:

1. Look for other kids. Their parents are in the same boat as you and will be much more sympathetic than childless couples.

2. Take provisions. Pack twice what you think you'll need. So your bag is a little heavy — if Junior has a bottle or teething cracker in his mouth and a gentle rattle in his hand, he'll be less likely to cry.

3. Go to the bathroom. If your child is on a teary tear, calm him in the rest room, where the entire restaurant doesn't have to hear him.

4. Limit the dining roam. If your child's walking, don't let him wander around the restaurant or peek over the booth at the next table. Not everyone will appreciate the intrusion, no matter how cute your child is.

5. Get dessert to go. Hate to rush you, but a speedier exit means less chance for your baby to interrupt everyone else's dinner.
Parenting, April 2007

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How to Be a Great Mom

Happier Restaurant Trips.